Thursday, June 21, 2007 

Scum-watch: Ban this sick site, on err, our network.

The Scum (proprietor: R. Murdoch) has in the past shamelessly plugged MySpace, (proprietor: R. Murdoch) but its latest article on the social networking site from hell is curious to say the least.

A MYSPACE page claiming to be the work of Yorkshire Ripper Peter Sutcliffe has been labelled "sick" by an MP.

The site includes the tagline "Well, it's me", as well as pictures of Sutcliffe and a report which claims to be his police confession, set against a background of hammers, knives and saws.

Well, call me a sick bastard but I have to say I find this particular joker's spoof Sutcliffe page (there are at least another 10) very faintly amusing, if only because of the links to other pranksters' pages on Kilroy-Silk and Roy Walker. Which MP did the Scum ring up to get a quote from?

Philip Davies, Conservative MP for Shipley, West Yorkshire, has also called for the page to be taken down.

Well, that fucking figures. This would be the same rent-a-gob MP who previously urged the non-existent Muslim yobs to fuck off, who claimed that the fact that prisoners who had been given the keys to their cells so that they could lock their possessions or themselves in was evidence that the government was turning jails into hotels, who said that he wouldn't have chosen bright pink as a colour to represent the United Kingdom because it was apparently a capitulation to the politically-correct world that this government appears to inhabit, and most humourously, had a round of handbags with the Labour MP Stephen Pound. Davies additionally supports the Campaign Against Political Correctness in parliament.

Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't wanting to censor potentially offensive internet sites just ever so slightly politically correct? Let's not beat around the bush, Davies is clearly an idiot, but even idiots tend to try not to contradict themselves.

Anyway, the Scum continues:

Olive Smelt, 78, of Halifax, who survived after Sutcliffe attacked her with a hammer, said the perpetrator should be locked up.

She said: “It is disgusting. For someone to actually pretend to be that man.

“It’s absolutely terrible, you wouldn’t think anyone would be sick enough to do that.

“I just can’t believe it, they should be locked up and I think any of his other victims would feel the same.”

Sutcliffe’s younger brother, Mick Sutcliffe, said the person responsible for the “sad and sick” site should be dealt with by the authorities.

“Whoever has set up this site must be mentally ill," he added. "They can’t be normal. It must be a very sick person.”

He said whoever was responsible needed to be found and put in front of a psychiatrist because they could be capable of doing something much worse.

Have any of these people ever even been on the internet? It was bad enough back in the Geocities days, but now you have to wade through torrents of shit, plenty of it far more offensive than anything on the Sutcliffe spoof page to find the ever decreasing pearls amongst the grunting, constantly-defecating swine. YouTube and MySpace are altars to the inane, idiotic and short-attention spans of this generation, with Rupert Murdoch and his fellow sensation purveyors chiefly responsible for this inexorable decline, coupled with the rise and rise of the moronic. You get the feeling that if any of these people saw goatse, let alone one of the pain series of images they'd call the police and complain that they'd been raped by their computer.

In any case, if the Scum feels this strongly about such pages on a website which err, its parent organisation additionally owns, why doesn't it get them taken down rather than bleat about them in a fashion which seems incredibly close to advertisement? Strangely, no one at MurdochSpace was available to comment, which perhaps ought to indicate just what the point of this article was.

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Monday, March 26, 2007 

The journalists have taken over the asylum.

At times, I'd like to be a fly on the wall in the editorial offices of the Daily Mail. Just to get a slight insight into how insidious the actual desire to wind the good burghers of Middle England into unrighteous outrage is. Does Dacre, when he's not calling someone a vagina twice in one sentence, honestly set out to distort a story as much as humanly possible, in order to cause a storm, however little reality there is to the report in question? How can the hacks write such utter bollocks and not want to rise up and throw the right-wing toad in the editor's chair out of the window?

Today's front page splash is a classic. CONVICTS HANDED KEYS TO CELLS, screams the headline, taking up so much of the page that the story is constricted into a tiny rectangle at the bottom. This latest politically correct insult to common sense means that nearly 6,000 out of 9,577 offenders in Yorkshire prisons have "privacy" locks to protect themselves and their belongings.

And that's the story. Note that they don't have the actual keys to the cells themselves. Usually only those in open prisons who are coming to the end of their sentence and who have jobs are given those so they can let themselves out early in the morning in order to get to work. No, these are privacy locks. And they do, to take the quote from the Ronseal ad, exactly what they say on the tin, or rather the key. As jailhouselawyer says, and seeing as he's been in prison and ought to know, these keys aren't a new thing. They've been in the system since the late 70s, and they're designed so that prisoners can lock their cells so that other inmates can't just walk in and help themselves to things, because, believe it or not, there tend to be thieves in prisons. Indeed, they can also be used by inmates to protect themselves: locking themselves in so no one other than the screws can get to them.

Guess what? According to the Daily Mail, this entirely acceptable trend, and I think most would agree that even criminals should be allowed to secure their belongings once they've been locked away, is further proof that the HUMAN-RIGHTS CULTURE IS OUT OF CONTROL. OK, I admit, I've put that all in caps when it isn't in the article, but what other conclusion is the casual reader meant to draw from the Mail's spin on this non-story?

Naturally, they've also got some outraged people in positions of almost power who can shout as loud as they can at this appalling injustice. First up we've got Philip Davies (who incidentally was the MP who had to retract his plea for the non-existent Windsor Muslim yobs to fuck off), the Shipley Tory MP:

Shipley Tory MP Philip Davies accused the Government of "turning prisons into hotels".

He said: "People will be horrified to know so many prisons give inmates their own keys. It will reinforce their views that the regime is far too lax and cushy.

"These people are banged up for a reason. But the Government seems more concerned about the human rights of criminals than those of their victims, who are footing the bill to keep them in increasingly pleasant surroundings."

Every time someone suggests that prisons are turning into hotels, I have to wonder just how much that person would like to spend just a night, not a whole sentence in one of these superb and welcoming lodges. Maybe Phil would like to consult either Jonathan Aitken or Jeffrey Archer, his ex-political colleagues, for their views on the current state of the nation's premier hostels. Neither, as far as I'm aware, were much enamoured with their temporary accommodation.

Next soundbite:

Blair Gibbs, director of the Tax-Payers' Alliance, said: "It is hard to believe we live in a serious country any more when you hear lunacy like this. Our politicians are clearly not capable of running anything that resembles an effective criminal justice system."

Ah yes, the Taxpayers' Alliance. These people really stick in my throat. There's one thing trying to represent a single interest group - I'm a proud member of the extremist Liberty, for instance - but it's quite another attempting to represent the whole nation, because that's what this group is pretending to do. Believe it or not, as elections tend to show, not every taxpayer agrees that taxes should always be moving lower, or as the Taxpayers' Alliance wants, a flat tax. You would also have thought that being a supposed alliance for taxpayers, they should perhaps stick to only commenting on taxes rather than the current banging up policies in the nation's jails. Obviously not. According to Mr Blair Gibbs, which is an interesting name to say the least, this is "lunacy". Personally, I find it lunacy that a group such as the Taxpayers' Alliance can be taken seriously and not told to go forth and multiply whenever they appear. Then again, this is the Daily Mail.

The next step in the article is to bring up a load of totally irrelevant other cases currently afflicting the prison system. Unsurprisingly, overcrowding due to the continuing crackdowns on crime isn't mentioned.

The revelation will still reinforce concern that prisoners' 'rights' are increasingly being pandered to.

In the financial year that ended last March, £8.8million in compensation was paid out to prisoners - almost 15 times as much as just two years earlier.

What the Daily Mail doesn't want you to know is that this figure includes compensation still being paid out to those who were abused during the reign of terror at Wormwood Scrubs in the 1990s, of which more than 160 prison officers were involved in, with 56 prisoners being beaten and psychologically tortured, told that they would be hung with sheets so that it looked like they'd committed suicide. Surprised that you perhaps haven't heard more about this? It's amazing what can be excused when prisons are full of people who are inherently evil or who deserve everything they get. There was incredibly little coverage of the scandal - only the Guardian dedicated much space to reporting it. The Daily Mail dedicated a whole 151 words to their story about the report by Peter Quinn.

Earlier this year, Derbyshire chief constable David Coleman was accused of 'madness' after refusing to release pictures of two escaped murderers amid fears it might breach their human rights. He claimed they posed 'no risk' to local people.

Which was his pathetic, ridiculous excuse for not getting the photographs out soon enough, which the tabloids of course jumped on because it meant they could bash the Human Rights Act again, even when it was comprehensively not at fault.

So there you have it. In prison, much stays the same, as it does in Daily Mail land. The next scheme to enrage Middle England should be starting to hit doorsteps in around 6 hours time.

Related post:
Five Chinese Crackers - Can we have some over-reaction please?

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Sunday, January 21, 2007 

Phil Davies MP retracts his "fuck off".

Following on from Mad Mel's non-apology about the Sun's inaccurate Windsor Muslim yobs report, the Tory MP Philip Davies has been good enough to retract his plea for those responsible to "fuck off", with again, major kudos to Mask of Anarchy for bothering to contacting him:

Anyone up for attempting to contact Damian Green MP and Sir Andrew Green to see whether they'll also do the decent thing?

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